Friday, November 30, 2007

Newspaper located in Chicago losing subscribers, due to poorly written articles allege some readers, said sources at America loves news, a nonproft.

Some idiots drove around the U of C last week and ended up shooting a Doctoral recipient who had planned on returning to help his native Senegal.

Prosecutors charged the second suspect in the homicide case. Today's lead in the Tribune read:
The second teenager charged in a string of violent robberies around the University of Chicago campus last week admitted in a videotaped confession to police to taking part in the crime spree, prosecutors alleged in court records made public Thursday.

Yuk...to the story and to the horribly-written lead... Is this even English? The lead of the story is supposed to draw the reader in, to make the reader want to read the rest of the story, not contradict everything that used to be beautiful about the English language.

How about this instead?
A second teenager confessed his involvement in a series of violent robberies on the University of Chicago campus last week, said prosecutors in publicly-released court records.

There. You get the gist of the story in a streamlined format with all the legally required info left in. Get to the mundane details later.

Another big thing in the Chicagoland news is a former Bolingbrooke police sergeant who is a suspect in the disappearance of his wife. Media coverage has included a personal view by People magazine and a heart-to-heart with Matt Lauer.

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